The Goat Pen

Sardis with the A+

Yeah, that's was good. So unexpected from sardis...

I went fishing with a friend of mine last week at the coast and we stopped just about sundown with just enough light to see our way across the creek to the boat ramp. I was on the front of the boat and fucking missed the dock and went in the water. It wasn't too cold but I killed my phone and a phone charger in my pocket (tried the rice thing for 36 hours but it didn't work). The worst thing is that I hit my back on the boat and either cracked or broke a rib. I've never really been injured my whole life in any way that affected me for more than a day or 2. Man, this shit sucks because every time I sneeze, fart or cough, it's like getting stabbed in the kidney. No health insurance and the doctor would just tell me to take Advil and give it a few weeks but this is giving me a preview of old age. I seriously do not want to hang around for that. I'm 57 and have got about 20 years, at most, left before shit really starts to fall apart.

20 years? Not sure about all that.

Yep. Nothing you can do about broken ribs except cry about the pain on the internet. Been there.

Oh, I'll be here for a while, Tree. I don't have the luck to die anytime soon.

Need help?

If you get involved with me, it won't work out for you. That's the formula.

Laughing with broken ribs hurts like a bitch, too…try to avoid it…

one thing I've never had to deal with knock on wood

Us drunks fall down alot

"Man, this shit sucks because every time I sneeze, fart or cough, it's like getting stabbed in the kidney."

So basically you're in constant pain...

Stu, I've got some Mexican morphine (tramadol) if you want some. I load up on it every time I go down there but never take it, so I've got plenty. It's not near as good as actual morphine, but I'm sure if you double up on the dosage it'll provide some relief...

2 years from now, Hedge will be in a prisoner exchange for El Chapo

It's going to take more than El Chapo...

They missed their chance in the early 90s

Today I find out if THC cartridges can actually make it through the US Post Office. That would be the only reason that cops would show up at my door anymore. Didn't know they were coming until yesterday. I have good friends I think. Or those fuckers are setting me up. Sometimes our pranks get out of hand.

They will. Nobody cares, dumbass.

Add wiping my ass to the list of things that are much more difficult. I didn't shit for 4 days after I banged my back on the boat. I guess everything tightened up back there. I took one, hard-earned dump yesterday, a bigger one last night and the floodgates just opened now. I might weigh less than 170 now.

Try cyanide. I hear it cures that.