The Goat Pen

eCat wrote:it really is deflating for me

here I am pushing my daughter - in a supportive way- not the boy's make you runs laps kinda way (different strokes)

and I think she's killing it and then it hits me like a ton of bricks that there are thousands - hell - hundred of thousands of kids out there killing it in the uber competitive nature of this right now.

so that does beg the question - how in the hell does an average moron like me who is 18 make it in the world today? I guess I would be an electrician.

If you want your daughter to max out her scholarship opps, I recommend getting a divorce now, and have her live with whichever of you and your wife makes less money.

aTm wrote:

eCat wrote:it really is deflating for me

here I am pushing my daughter - in a supportive way- not the boy's make you runs laps kinda way (different strokes)

and I think she's killing it and then it hits me like a ton of bricks that there are thousands - hell - hundred of thousands of kids out there killing it in the uber competitive nature of this right now.

so that does beg the question - how in the hell does an average moron like me who is 18 make it in the world today? I guess I would be an electrician.

If you want your daughter to max out her scholarship opps, I recommend getting a divorce now, and have her live with whichever of you and your wife makes less money.

I filled out Fafsa or whatever its called for the boy and he can't even get a guaranteed loan. Its bullshit

Jungle Rat wrote:Just let her be a kid. Stop with the pressure. If she ends up at UC Blue Ash learning how to clean teeth so be it. It's not like you need a college education anymore to stake your claim in this world.

The pressure is self induced.

She wants to go full time at UC Clermont and forgo her Senior year. I told her no - take AP classes at school, go to football games, play lacrosse, go to prom , date a boy

She understands how competitive the world is nowadays.

The boy...not so much.

The pushing I'm doing is getting her to stay on top of paperwork and test registrations, etc.,

It's not impossible for your daughter and she's early in the game. Start with Kranse and get her extre-curriculurs up.

eCat wrote:I filled out Fafsa or whatever its called for the boy and he can't even get a guaranteed loan. Its bullshit

It's not just the family income part. The committees and clubs that give out even merit based stuff with things like interviews will eat that bullshit up from your "struggling daughter raised by a single parent in a one income home." I'm not really joking at all.

"so that does beg the question - how in the hell does an average moron like me who is 18 make it in the world today?"

Well, she does have one advantage over the average male moron in that position...

Bklyn wrote:It's not impossible for your daughter and she's early in the game. Start with Kranse and get her extre-curriculurs up.

There is plan B here - she's actually really good at Lacrosse. Matter of fact a recruiter talked to her last night at a clinic she was helping out with. She scored two left handed goals on their guest goalie and that got their attention. I don't think she's legitimate D1 level, but she athletic scholarship pretending to be academic scholarship good enough for D2.

But you're right - I told her this year she needs to do 3 things. Intern at a medical facility, volunteer at a charity and obtain some leadership position , either in school or the community.

Her senior year she'll head up some type of thing - a community clean up or something and I'll get some press on it in the local community newspaper.

aTm wrote:

eCat wrote:I filled out Fafsa or whatever its called for the boy and he can't even get a guaranteed loan. Its bullshit

It's not just the family income part. The committees and clubs that give out even merit based stuff with things like interviews will eat that bullshit up from your "struggling daughter raised by a single parent in a one income home." I'm not really joking at all.

I understand the logic. I couldn't do it though

"She understands how competitive the world is nowadays.

The boy...not so much."

Well, the world needs ditch diggers too...

"The committees and clubs that give out even merit based stuff with things like interviews will eat that bullshit up from your "struggling daughter raised by a single parent in a one income home." I'm not really joking at all."

So you're seriously advising eCat to divorce his wife on the chance that the "struggling daughter of a single parent" narrative will garner sympathy with scholarship grantors? Even for in here, that seems a bridge too far...

I wish you would drive over a bridge too far... when the sign says "Bridge Out"

I'm not seriously saying eCat should get a divorce, but I'm seriously saying it would help his daughter get money for college if he did. Anyway, it sounds like eCat is more worried about entrance requirements than the CAAAAISH

hedge wrote:"The committees and clubs that give out even merit based stuff with things like interviews will eat that bullshit up from your "struggling daughter raised by a single parent in a one income home." I'm not really joking at all."

So you're seriously advising eCat to divorce his wife on the chance that the "struggling daughter of a single parent" narrative will garner sympathy with scholarship grantors? Even for in here, that seems a bridge too far...

my fear is if I propose it, my wife might not hesitate to agree.

Just do it. What does it matter if you're reduced to a life of penury and vienna sausages, as long as your daughter gets a scholarship?

My son graduated in a class of 400+ with a 3.0, and didn't rank in the top 1/2 of his class.

We went to awards night to watch him get recognition for his baseball scholarship, and we had to sit through 100+ kids in his class who were members of the 30+ ACT club. Less than 1 in 5...

I was blown away. Public school, mind you...

I had a CSR whose son was a valedictorian of his rural H.S. with a 4.0 gpa. Couldn't get more than a 17 on his ACT after multiple tries.

ugh. I am not looking forward to this shit...

Also, my wife said that if we have a daughter, she wants the child to go to Peace or Salem (family deal). I laughed and told her she can try to push that shit but to stop planning what cannot be planned. She became ill. I then made a remark about getting a much better education at UNC for much less money. She was pissed and took that as me insulting her Peace degree. She then asked if I thought Peace was just some glorified finishing school or some such shit. I was on Glenlivet and ice number five or six. I gave a blank stare for too long and when she kept pressing, I said "yep!"

Let's just say that's a sore subject in our home....

ECAT - Push the lacrosse stuff. That is easy money for a scholarship since they have to fill the team and if she is any good, even better. She could get a decent ride.

As far as the divorce thing, it is amazing. What my wife makes if we got divorced, she could get housing, food stamps, and all other sorts of stuff plus my daughter would probably get money for college. All I need is a physical address to get mail and I could still live with her and still keep all the benefits. If anybody would check, I stay there a couple of nights a week as we are trying to work it out and get back together. Hell, we wouldn't have to tell anyone just keep our social media presence down and no one would know the difference either way. I would pay child support and the entire thing. File individual tax returns with alternate years on child claiming. I think we could pull this off without anyone knowing the wiser.

aTm wrote:

eCat wrote:I filled out Fafsa or whatever its called for the boy and he can't even get a guaranteed loan. Its bullshit

It's not just the family income part. The committees and clubs that give out even merit based stuff with things like interviews will eat that bullshit up from your "struggling daughter raised by a single parent in a one income home." I'm not really joking at all.

Sadly this is the case, but only up to a point (not promoting divorce, just the hardship issue). There are a lot of scholarships out there. The most common by the way are for woman. Have her take up golf lessons, there is a scholarship that my friend got for his daughter for that. There are scholarships based on where you are from. There are scholarships based on the area she wants to go in. Just make sure she picks a field that she will get paid for. Philosophy may be fun (well to someone out there, it may be fun), but not many jobs on that front.

The real key is the summer jobs, groups research she does once she is in school.

As I've said before, eCat's son is going to be just fine working in middle management after he comes outta whatever school takes him. His daughter will have the school thing work out, she'll find a job that is socially responsible and fulfilling, but she won't make much money at all. The son will let her stay over his house with her family when they come to town for visits. He'll also let them use one of the cars to get around in, so they have some autonomy while his family is at work.

It's the way it always happens.