The Goat Pen

Prince Fielder is a vegetarian, and his titties bounce when he runs the bases...

Well, I guess bakeries are all vegetarian...

ain't no meat in donuts

Why does AA's people hate me so?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to- ... -think-so/

Bklyn wrote:Why does AA's people hate me so?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to- ... -think-so/

mental note: Never let anyone from the University of Virginia treat you. They are idiots

Bklyn wrote:Why does AA's people hate me so?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to- ... -think-so/

Those ate Spacer's people. Not mine. I was admin.

Bklyn wrote:Why does AA's people hate me so?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to- ... -think-so/

sad but funny

So the son has chosen my alma mater (and my wife's) for his masters in Computer Science.

Owlman wrote:So the son has chosen my alma mater (and my wife's) for his masters in Computer Science.

not a sports fan eh?

Heh

Hooty hoo!

eCat wrote:

Owlman wrote:So the son has chosen my alma mater (and my wife's) for his masters in Computer Science.

not a sports fan eh?

Sadly, I'm the only sports fan in my family

so since his last GF fucked him over , my son has been in kind of a dry spell with girls and I've been giving him shit about using Tinder.

He just turned 18 so I pushed him to try OKCupid. He didn't want to and though it was stupid but I told him I'd do all the legwork , setup his account, ask him questions, whatever and all he has to do is start messaging girls

so I set it up and it asks questions about religion , guns, how many dates before you have sex, pretty basic stuff. I get him to post some pictures and I work with him to create a non threatening vanilla profile figuring that staying within the margins so to speak would increase his chances of meeting people.

ok, so at this point I have his user ID and password to his account - and now I have your full attention

OKCupid - the free version anyways lets you know who has looked at your profile at right off the bat two 50 year old women - I mean within 20 minutes jump on his profile. Now maybe its because it was influenced by a 50 year old man but I don't think so

After seeing grandma hit on him, he REALLY thinks this is a bad idea but I press him to keep on. Nope, fuck this noise, He washes his hands of the whole thing.

The next day he has a message in his inbox or whatever its called and its a 23 year old hottie who basically is a prostitute. She doesn't even mess around with the hi, my name is Shelia - she goes straight for the "are you DTF, then contact me at my webcam site and we'll work something out". I knew she messaged him so I was telling my wife - hey this thing might work out - but then he told me what the message said and that was a waste of time.

so 3 days in and this whole online dating thing is a huge freak show

so now I get online (as him) but lets just set aside the whole 50 year old dad pretending to be 18 year old son creep thing for a moment, because my son is done with this, he didn't want to do it in the first place and all he is attracting is post menopausal cougars and camwhores.

OKCupid , from best I can tell, works like this - you go in and set these filters - I'm a dude looking for women ages x to y and I live here. Based on how I answered those questions, show me matches with a mileage range of where I live.

So once I figure this out I can start kind of narrowing down potential girls for him to message. At this point its analytics to me and I'm looking at it from a stats standpoint.

Now if any of you have daughters on OkCupid, just stop reading now

So in the age group of 18-20 in the 25 mile range of where we live, I'd say 35% of all women on there looking for men in a short or long term relationship describe themselves as bisexual or pansexual (any port in a storm), at least 55% of them are some donut eaters (curvy if you don't want to be mean about it), and maybe 20% are DTF ( < 3 dates for sex).

so you can bookmark a girls profile, so I found maybe 8 that were above a 75% match according to OKCupid criteria that were within 10 miles of where we are and he has messaged 3 of them with a basic - Hi, I'm XXX, It looks like we might have some things in common , your profile caught my attention and I thought I'd message you.

and I had to threaten to throw his Xbox out in order to get him to do that.

So far its been a day and not a single one has bothered to message back which has to hit his ego even harder.

I have to say, I thought this would be easy for him - I figured these girls would be..well.. for lack of better term.....desperate.

failed parenting by dad on this one.

I'm glad my son is only 9.

wonder why they even ask you questions for

sounds like the same girls are answering every potential suitor

I've been on dates using OKCupid, and basically friend zoned a couple girls I wasnt really attracted into kind of online pen pals or whatever without asking them to meet.

I'll say that " Hi, I'm XXX, It looks like we might have some things in common , your profile caught my attention and I thought I'd message you." wont get any nibbles unless your kid has obviously real and obviously "hawt" (to his age group) pics for a girl to message back. It is way too generic of an icebreaker and sounds like an automated message. You can send that and get bites, but you need to send it to like 50 girls not 10. Best shot is to actually read their profile and comment on something they wrote in that. Also seed the boys own profile with funny quips or non-generic content so girls can have something to comment on and thus initiate for themselves. Most unsolicited messages I received were comments on things I put in my profile that weren't "Staying within the margins."

Also if the girl is remotely attractive on a free site like OkCupid, she is probably getting a fuckton of messages just like your son's every day.

Places like Match and eHarmony where girls are paying to use them in a lot of cases, are much easier to find serious interest, but also tend to be girls looking for something more than a few fucks.

alright...I'll tell him that and see what we come up with

Also, this smashes all other instances of extreme helicopter parenting that I can remember seeing...