The Goat Pen

I'm impressed either way but staged would be an elaborate action on their part

Jungle Rat wrote:

innocentbystander wrote:

Jungle Rat wrote:Got pulled over by the Coast Guard today. That's a first. Routine inspection probably trying to teach my daughters about boater safety. They were cool. Still though, it's like getting pulled over by a cop on the road. Your adrenaline starts pumping even though you know you're cool yet you have that split second to stop or flee. I thought about fleeing for a second because I knew I was good and it would sorta be fun. Then I saw the gun on the front. We stopped. Thank God I have all my warrants cleared up.

Good thing those Coast Guard weren't former Ferguson PD or they would have shot you (or at the very least, hit your boat with tear gas.)

Rat we were talking about moving our boat from the Arizona lakes region to San Diego (and the sea) getting a slip in Cali. Serious question, how often do you have to work on the motors to clean out the salt water if you put in on the sea? Ours is an inboard engine (260 cubic inches) basically just a V-8 car engine. Nothing special. It is almost 28 years old but it has never touched salt water. I have no idea how to maintain a motorboat on salt water.

I don't either. I hire people to figure out that stuff.

Thanks. I guess I'll have to do the same.

Damn, Rat, why didn't you tell him to add oil to his gas if he was going to be running in salt water? That's all you've got to do, IB. Trust me...

Sounds like a plan.

IB, don't worry. If you're running a four stroke engine, you do the opposite. You just add gas into the oil. Trust me. You will thank me later.

hedge wrote:Damn, Rat, why didn't you tell him to add oil to his gas if he was going to be running in salt water? That's all you've got to do, IB. Trust me...

You guys are terrible.

seafoam

not shitting you on that - use it regularly and you'll keep the carb and engine clean.

eCat wrote:seafoam

not shitting you on that - use it regularly and you'll keep the carb and engine clean.

Alright if we move it out of our slip and to San Diego, I will take a look at that.

We probably will move it at somepoint, but its just hard to say goodbye to the slip we've got. The deal we worked out with the marina, we get a 10% discount for getting a slip for a whole year, and a 5% discount on top of that for paying for the whole year in advance! So our slip (a covered slip, mind you) at a Marina with brand new showers and an inexpensive restaurant that serves good food, it only costs us $260 a month. And the fact that it is covered with free electric for the AC unit, we'll just hang out there in the summer time when its 110 degrees outside. Its nice on the slip in the shade. No way will we get that good of a deal in California.

eCat wrote:seafoam

not shitting you on that - use it regularly and you'll keep the carb and engine clean.

Seafoam has been clensing my anus since you were born.

ok

Will all great Neptune's seafoam wash this crap
Clean from Rat's anus? No, this Rat's anus will rather
The multitudinous seas in incarnadine,
Making the green one brown.

does incarnadine mean anything? its not a butthole that changes colors is it? I refuse to look it up

In that passage, it means to make something red (as blood). I guess I should've looked up a word that means to make something brown, but it's highly likely that Rat bleeds from his asshole, so it still works...

Needless to say, this is not one of the finer moments in the history of Shakespeare studies...

Saltwater is a great cure for ass bleeding.

So, I'm out on Shelter Island this week, just outside the Hamptons, with my family. It's a beautiful place. Beach is great. Not many cars. Close to the Hamptons without the crowds. Can hit Sag Harbor or East Hampton without too much trouble. My kids are getting everything that they don't from NYC. They have a deck. A back yard...a side yard...a front yard and a fire pit. They have deer and wild turkey traipsing through the property. I'm paying a shitload of loot for this house with more bedrooms than people inside it. All that said, the place is horrible. Dog hair (I'm guessing it's dog hair) everywhere (although the place advertised as "no pets"). A housekeeper was here before we got here, allegedly, and yet under each and every bed is a kennel. My wife made me buy a Swiffer to do the type of cleaning we expect to have in a place. The hot water went out and when the plumber got here it was working again before he did anything...then it went out again when I was showering (thankfully after my wife and kids)...so I called him again and he fixed the problem. There is a hornets nest right next to the breezeway, so that sliding door never opens and my kids can't play in that section of the house. My wife is so annoyed I can't get none and will have to wait until we get back to the Brooklyn estate to "check her for ticks."

I can't sit around a beach all day with these surgically enhanced second wives and "home from college" broads with minimal body fat and not expect to take it out on my wife at day's end. This is a problem. I don't do 3 hours a week with a trainer and 2 hours a week on my own keeping my testosterone up in order to not put it to good use.

I'm getting some money back from this property owner if it kills me.

hang on to that swiffer when you call him

It is gratifying to know that renters in the elite enclaves of eastern Long Island face the same indignities as those in Myrtle Beach...

btw, why didn't you take that swiffer (my word for the day) and beat the hell out of that hornets nest?

also, what was the problem with the hot water?

I was going to say why didn't you douse the hornets nest with hot water, but they stymied even that...