The Goat Pen

Posted: **Sat Jul 30, 2022 10:45 am**

I laughed…

Posted: **Sat Jul 30, 2022 10:50 am**

Posted: **Wed Aug 03, 2022 6:50 pm**

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Posted: **Tue Aug 16, 2022 12:04 pm**

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Posted: **Wed Aug 17, 2022 4:37 pm**

IB counseling.

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Posted: **Thu Aug 18, 2022 6:11 pm**

Posted: **Fri Aug 19, 2022 10:58 pm**

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Posted: **Sun Aug 21, 2022 5:23 pm**

Mrs. E

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 7:49 am**

kitchen island conversation at our household a few days ago

son has a new GF, on the second date they got active, on the 3rd date they had sex

just me knowing that is night and day difference in the house I grew up in

but this is the conversation between him and my wife as we were making dinner

him: "well we did it last time we were together,"
my wife "did you use a condom?"
him: "no, she said she was on birth control"
me " aww...don't fall for that shit"
my wife "you need to buy some condoms..like right after dinner"
him "I wasn't expecting to have sex , it went further than last time"
my wife "what, did you just get a handjob last time?"
him "well yeah"

there is no world where I would imagine a mother asking her son if he "just got a handjob"

but its perfectly normal in our house.

Luckily I am spared from the conversations between her and my daughter. I think I might need therapy if I wasn't.

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 9:09 am**

The MIF's youngest daughter was like that. Never graphic details but we'd all be sitting around talking who she hooked up with, etc. She didn't give a fuck. The older daughter was more prudish, she'd never talk about her sex life (I don't think she fucked until her sophomore year in college). But yeah, different world than we grew up in...

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 9:12 am**

"kitchen island conversation at our household a few days ago"

When I first read that, I thought you wrote "kitchen island conversion," and of course I thought we were going to get the details of you doing some kind of home improvement and I was thinking "why is this on the NSFW thread?"

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 9:13 am**

eCat wrote: ↑Tue Aug 23, 2022 7:49 am
Luckily I am spared from the conversations between her and my daughter. I think I might need therapy if I wasn't.

Wanna know the answer?

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 10:53 am**

eCat wrote: ↑Tue Aug 23, 2022 7:49 am kitchen island conversation at our household a few days ago

son has a new GF, on the second date they got active, on the 3rd date they had sex

just me knowing that is night and day difference in the house I grew up in

but this is the conversation between him and my wife as we were making dinner

him: "well we did it last time we were together,"
my wife "did you use a condom?"
him: "no, she said she was on birth control"
me " aww...don't fall for that shit"
my wife "you need to buy some condoms..like right after dinner"
him "I wasn't expecting to have sex , it went further than last time"
my wife "what, did you just get a handjob last time?"
him "well yeah"

there is no world where I would imagine a mother asking her son if he "just got a handjob"

but its perfectly normal in our house.

Luckily I am spared from the conversations between her and my daughter. I think I might need therapy if I wasn't.

Jesus H. Christ

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 10:55 am**

There were times my folks all but walked in on me, but it was never acknowledged in mixed company like that. Dad would make some remark like “did you have fun?” followed by “be safe,” but he sure as fuck never discussed details like that.

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 11:04 am**

safe to say there is nothing my kids don't think they can discuss with us.

there have been times when I have said "hey I don't need to know the details here" like when my son was bragging about making the last GF's leg shake during sex.

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 11:42 am**

When she was in college, the MIF's youngest daughter told us that she hooked up with a guy who had a prosthetic nut. We still refer to him as Neutical. A couple weeks ago, she and her husband were at the house, the MIF was talking about some patient she had at the health dept. who was freaking out about having anyone stick their finger in his belly button. Not sure how that came up at the health dept, but I chimed in that I didn't want anybody sticking their finger in my belly button either. Or my ass. At which point the son-in-law said "Greta says she wants to fuck me in the ass with a strap-on," which she cheerfully acknowledged...

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 11:51 am**

Goddamn

Posted: **Tue Aug 23, 2022 11:52 am**

That mother fucker hasn’t been through the trauma of a prostate exam. Once that happens, he sure as fuck won’t let her do that.

The Goat Pen

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