The Goat Pen

Or prof is full of shit and Tenpenny and Jones were popped for pot. Believe me, we want both on campus from a football standpoint.

Planting weed in the non-hacker's car and calling the cops must be the new schollie numbers management tool in T-town. Everybody's on to the old medical hardship technique now.

It's shameful how Bammer treated those children.

Bammer?

no, not Bammer

Eva pulled the lipstick from her purse in one long slow deliberate motion. As she turned the base, the red point of the lipstick corkscrewed upward. Mesmerized, I watched as she brought it to her lips and smoothed it on with a circular motion.

She turned toward me and spoke without speaking at all. This wordless primal sonnet commanded my rapt attention. I closed my eyes and eased back, confident that I was going to pay for what was happening, but I was powerless to stop her. This story had already been written. I couldn't change the script; I could only turn the next page.

"Eva pulled the lipstick from her purse in one long slow deliberate motion. As she turned the base, the red point of the lipstick corkscrewed upward."

I hope Eva wasn't a male dog...

You have seen male dogs, referred to as 'she', who pull lipsticks from purses?

Interesting area you live in.

Cross-dressing dog, red lipstick coming out of the tube = dog's dick, a.k.a. "red october". Thus, "I hope she wasn't a male dog". I know my sophisticated brand of humor isn't always appreciated in here, but I thought you would've gotten that one...

Gotten what?

that he is a crossdressing dog, obviously

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

I hide my kit in the john. Makes me nervous to be so obvious but not much choice. Cons will find anything. They're better than bloodhounds at finding stashes of contraband. Always feel a wave of relief when I pull it out of the trap. Still there! Quickly check the kit. Spoon, sharp, dope, cotton, paper clip...all present and accounted for. Paperclip is for the fire. Lighters and matches are hard to get and keep. So, to burn my spoon to cook takes work. You take the paperclip and straighten it out and then bend it into a "U" shape and wrap with shit paper. Stick the prongs into an outlet, it'll spark, and catch the paper on fire. Sure, you get shocked some...and your fingertips burnt, but you get fire. And fire cooks the dope and the dope heals the sickness...well, not heals, but it keeps the demons at bay for a few more hours.

Look we may be following a lame football season with a flirting-with-500 hoop season, but we don't deserve this cretinous dialogue. Baseball is off to 4-0 start, maybe that's where the fun will be this year.

Hey, could be softball; gators are #1.

there's a drive...WAY BACK, that ball is outta here...cleared the 170ft sign with room to spare

This coming from a fan of a chick ball school. Very rich.

The 170ft jab notwithstanding, I kinda dig CSB. Our SS last year looked like a SI swimsuit model..and she could glove like Ozzie Smith.

Gators ARE #1. Yer welcome.

My niece is a HS freshman softball player. She's gotten a lot of (unofficial because rules duh) attention from UT...they had her run the bases 3 times because they've never seen someone so young run them so fast.

"Our SS last year looked like a SI swimsuit model..and she could glove like Ozzie Smith."

When I saw the word "glove" I just knew you were going to say something about her vaginal prowess. I don't know whether to be impressed or disappointed that you didn't...

Even after I read the whole thing, I was still pretty sure that you were saying something about her vagina being able to comfortably accommodate even a huge black cock like Ozzie Smith's...