Uncle Bud

eCat · Post by **eCat** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 6:54 am

ok I will

hedge · Post by **hedge** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 9:21 am

never heard of hint water, but I would avoid artificial sweetners (except maybe a little bit of stevia) if at all possible. Have you got a juicer? Seems I remember talking about that some time ago. A cucumber is basically 100% water. Same with watermelon (including the rind - as a side note, they say there is some viagra-like property in watermelon rind) and really most fruits and vegetables. Good way to get in your raw fruit/vegetable quota (and then some) and also hydrate...

eCat · Post by **eCat** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 9:55 am

I have a very nice juicer that is a great dust collector. To use a pun, the juice isn't worth the squeeze in the effort it takes to get fresh juice to me.

hedge · Post by **hedge** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 10:01 am

That's right, you've actually got a nice one. Breville, right? Once you start seeing the results, the prep and cleanup won't seem that bad...

Saint · Post by **Saint** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 12:36 pm

The results will be 4-5 liquid shits a day along with a good hour of cleanup, both the juicer and your ass

eCat · Post by **eCat** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 12:53 pm

it might be easier just to buy new Levis a size bigger

AlabamAlum · Post by **AlabamAlum** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 12:55 pm

hedge · Post by **hedge** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 1:20 pm

Stu's experience with anything to do with healthy living is very limited at best and by limited I mean nonexistent. Pay no heed to his attempts to alarm, which is really just an attempt to keep you at his own level of sloth and decrepitude. There are few if any gastrointestinal effects of fresh juice, but obviously you're going to piss more...

hedge · Post by **hedge** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 1:22 pm

The foul gastrointestinal effects of Stu's lifestyle, on the other hand, are something to which I can bear bitter firsthand witness...

Saint · Post by **Saint** » Wed Dec 06, 2017 6:22 pm

You should be paying no attention to hedge's fascination with the machinations of your colon.

crotch · Post by **crotch** » Sat Dec 09, 2017 5:43 pm

Hedge and the Mrs. getting in a little front porch quality time.....

[youtube]_nLmM9kcBKs[/youtube]

Jungle Rat · Post by **Jungle Rat** » Sat Dec 16, 2017 2:05 pm

Stu never ate because the withdrawal was to intense. He couldn't keep down water.

Jungle Rat · Post by **Jungle Rat** » Sun Dec 17, 2017 11:37 pm

If there was a smell meter for my poop you would definitely vote chicken noodle.

Saint · Post by **Saint** » Sun Dec 17, 2017 11:53 pm

My shits smell like ham

10ac · Post by **10ac** » Mon Dec 18, 2017 12:48 am

My shit smells like shit.

Jungle Rat · Post by **Jungle Rat** » Tue Dec 19, 2017 11:38 am

Totally chicken noodle

eCat · Post by **eCat** » Wed Dec 20, 2017 8:45 am

ok so I guess I really didn't know what to expect on that low carb diet but I"m averaging losing 2 pounds a week without exercise, but at this rate I'd be on it 5 months - I'm not doing that.

Seems kind of pointless to stay overly dedicated during Xmas so like 5 million other people I'll go into a low calorie with exercise diet in January but during the holidays I'm not going to go wild, I'll indulge in the bad stuff but with moderation.

At 51 ,2 pounds a week without exercise is probably pretty decent, I forget I'm not 30 anymore. At 30 I could eat a lean cuisine for lunch and a salad for dinner , run around the block and lose a pound a day.

But 2 pounds a week will drive me insane. At that rate I'll run to the scale after taking a large poop just to feel good about myself.

hedge · Post by **hedge** » Wed Dec 20, 2017 9:03 am

You didn't get to your current portly state overnight, it took years of neglect and self-abuse. Consequently, you're not going to get back where you want to be overnight either. Patience, Grasshopper...

Also, I would think a low carb diet wouldn't be such a hardship for a carnivore like yourself. Eat all the bacon and eggs you want, any meats and cheeses, eat raw veggies when you have to have some carbs. Quitting breads and grain products wasn't a big deal for me and I never drank much (if any) soda or even gatorade and shit like that. My biggest thing was alcohol, or rather I should say, I thought my biggest thing was going to be alcohol, but once I got thru the first week, I wasn't a big deal at all. I haven't quit completely, but I'd say my alcohol consumption in 2017 was about 25% (probably less) than in years past. That alone took care of 10 lbs...

eCat · Post by **eCat** » Wed Dec 20, 2017 9:16 am

hedge wrote:You didn't get to your current portly state overnight, it took years of neglect and self-abuse. Consequently, you're not going to get back where you want to be overnight either. Patience, Grasshopper...

Also, I would think a low carb diet wouldn't be such a hardship for a carnivore like yourself. Eat all the bacon and eggs you want, any meats and cheeses, eat raw veggies when you have to have some carbs. Quitting breads and grain products wasn't a big deal for me and I never drank much (if any) soda or even gatorade and shit like that. My biggest thing was alcohol, or rather I should say, I thought my biggest thing was going to be alcohol, but once I got thru the first week, I wasn't a big deal at all. I haven't quit completely, but I'd say my alcohol consumption in 2017 was about 25% (probably less) than in years past. That alone took care of 10 lbs...

it wasn't really a hardship at all - I increased my egg intake and cheese, even being in Chicago I'm certain I stayed at or below 100g of Carbs every day, but calories wise I was probably at 1200-1500, maybe higher on days with a cheese omelette for breakfast. It did introduce us to spaghetti squash which is now a stable in our household and substituting zuchini for potatoes in a pot roast. I also started eating alot more greek and julienne salads.

Alcohol isn't my issue - it has to be bread for me - considering the pizza, pasta and sandwiches I take in during a regular week.

I just have to get better results than 2 pounds a week though.

hedge · Post by **hedge** » Wed Dec 20, 2017 9:59 am

The slower you lose the weight the more likely you are to keep it off. One of my buddies here went on some extreme diet (I think there were also some pills involved, pills suggested by some nutritionist, not anything illegal), anyway, he lost about 40 lbs. pretty quickly, but he gained it all back (and looks like he even added some more) almost as quickly when he went off the diet. That shit doesn't work long term...

Agree about the spaghetti squash, I would say that was a game changer, but I never really ate much pasta or bread in the first place and cutting it out almost completely hasn't been any hardship for me at all. But now when the MIF makes a dish with the spaghetti squash, I do partake...

The Goat Pen

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