Ostensibly Hoops

[hedge]

Best case scenario for Kansas:

"Joel Embiid rises up from infirmary to once again play like the No. 1 draft pick many think he will be. Scoffing at back pain, Embiid lays it all on the line for the school he will spend another six weeks attending. He blocks shots. He dunks. He passes with skill. He shoots with touch. When he grimaces, overwrought Kansas fans grimace with him – but he does not grimace often. His back is back, he is back, and the Jayhawks are back, defeating Syracuse and Florida to reach the Final Four. Once there, Kansas defeats long-shot North Carolina – getting in one more chance to beat up on Ol’ Roy. The national title game brings the season full circle, as Wiggins and Jabari Parker duel again with the same result – Jayhawks win. Bill Self signs a lifetime deal and lines up three more killer recruiting classes."

[hedge]

Best case for UVa:

" The Cavaliers win the battle of uber-balanced teams in the semifinals, beating Florida, and ultimately frustrate Louisville into submission in the national title game. They are the least sexy national champion in years, possibly decades, and could not care less. Thirty years after Ralph came and went without a title, the unfinished quest is fulfilled. The Tobacco Road elitist preppie prigs finally must pay their respects north toward the Charlottesville elitist preppie prigs."

[hedge]

Worst case for UVa:

" The Colonials pull the upset and Virginia's most successful season in a long time is over early. Tobacco Road elitist preppie prigs curl their stiff upper lips at another flameout by the Charlottesville elitist preppie prigs, then watch Duke and North Carolina both make the Final Four. Lacrosse team bombs as well."

[eCat]

doesn't look like we have much interest for a money pool

probably because Yahoo is a bunch if dicks

[hedge]

No. 6 NORTH CAROLINA
Best Case: Having succeeded in once again lowering expectations with back-to-back losses, the Tar Heels are due for another jarring change of course. They provide it by making a spirited sprint to the Final Four. Marcus Paige plays like the best point guard in the tournament, scoring and distributing and making steals. James Michael McAdoo stays out of foul trouble and delivers consistently inside. Leslie McDonald's wandering shooting eye returns, and the Heels even make key free throws when they have to. Ol' Roy enjoys this dadgum ride as much as any of 'em, even if it ends in the national semifinals against Florida. Then he gets busy again on the recruiting trail and closes the widening talent gap between Chapel Hill and Durham. Speaking of Durham: Duke flames out against Mercer. Meanwhile, the PackPride vigilantes find another hobby and stop the proctology exam of the Tar Heels.

Worst Case: Carolina goes 2-for-9 down the stretch from the foul line and loses its opener to Providence. After all the heavy breathing late in the regular season about the Tar Heel resurgence, it's only fitting that a team this unpredictable goes out with a whimper on a three-game losing streak. Ol' Roy doesn't even bother to summon the annual season-ending tears on behalf of a group as loco as this one. Williams spends more time at Pinehurst and Peach Jam, and Duke keeps winning the recruiting battles – after the Blue Devils win yet another national title in Dallas. Meanwhile, the PackPride vigilantes have no other hobbies and vow to retrace every step P.J. Hairston took while at North Carolina.

[hedge]

"doesn't look like we have much interest for a money pool "

If I'm the only one in, I'm entering 4 brackets...

[hedge]

The most disturbing part of the UNC analysis was the recurring theme of the widening talent gap b/w us and Dook...

[hedge]

No. 8 KENTUCKY
Best Case: Tweaked out of their funk by John Calipari, the rejuvenated Wildcats discover how good they can be and romp through the Midwest region. Previously dysfunctional Andrew Harrison continues his recent run of prudent point-guard play, leading an easy victory over fading Kansas State. Kentucky's armada of big men dwarfs Wichita State, which finally feels the pressure of its perfect record. Buoyed by a favorable matchup with Louisville in the Sweet 16, Calipari continues his recent ownership of Pitino by becoming the first coach to beat him in that round of play – a defeat Louisville fans simply cannot stomach. With a one-point lead on Duke in the regional final, Cal guards the inbounds pass and Willie Cauley-Stein deflects it for the victory. In the Final Four, Kentucky avenges 1997 title-game loss to Arizona, and gets a fourth crack at Florida for the championship. James Young keeps his footing this time and scores the winning basket at the buzzer. Disastrous season somehow ends with a national title – the first by a No. 8 seed since Villanova in 1985. NBA increases minimum draft age to 20. Calipari signs 10-year extension. Pitino retires.

[hedge]

Worst Case: Harrison twins revert at the wrong time, deciding only to pass to each other against a Kansas State team toughened by the brutal Big 12. Julius Randle's layup yips intensify. James Young cannot make a jumper. All the negativity returns as the less-talented Wildcats upset the more-talented Wildcats, who have just three wins against teams in the NCAA field – none in the last two months. Calipari gets tossed, leaves the arena in St. Louis while the game is in progress, calls in to his postgame radio show from a barge headed south on the Mississippi River, and otherwise isn't heard from for three weeks. By the time he resurfaces, Louisville has won a second straight national title and all his underclassmen but Dominique Hawkins and Derek Willis have turned pro or transferred. Without an NCAA tourney win since 2012, Calipari joins them, going to the Knicks. In Lubbock, Tubby Smith notices that Kentucky has double-digit losses for the second year in a row.

[hedge]

From best case for Louisville:

"In the same city where Louisville won the '86 title, the Cardinals get past Arizona in the semifinals behind a monster game from Montrezl Harrell, and win it all over Michigan State on a Russdiculous one-on-five driving scoop shot. Pitino gets huge tattoo of Russ' winning shot on his chest. Harrell decides he likes this dynasty thing and declines to enter the NBA draft. Kentucky fans, homebound and surly since their team was bounced by Kansas State, go back to reading the 2014 recruiting rankings and remind themselves that draft day is the biggest day of the year."

[hedge]

Dook:

Worst Case: Lulled into a slow start after an early tipoff, Duke finds itself locked in a surprisingly tight game against wily Mercer. When the entire Duke team tries to slide in and take a charge from Langston Hall late in the game, official takes a deep breath and says to himself, "This one is for all the small schools that never had a chance," and signals block. Enraged Krzyzewski fires Sharpie into the upper deck and gets a technical. Watching on TV, Jim Boeheim roars with laughter. Gordon Hayward smiles. Mercer makes four free throws for the lead and holds on to shock the Blue Devils. Jabari Parker takes off his Duke uniform for the last time. North Carolina mounts an incomprehensible run to the national title. NCAA decides to cancel hologram project.

[hedge]

This has been about as sassless an opening tourny week as I can recall, probably a combination of our teams sucking and after 10+ years of the same old sass, we're too old and tired to care anymore...

[innocentbystander]

Hedge, don't forget to to one for Creighton, Wisconsin, and also Villanova.

[eCat]

This has been about as sassless an opening tourny week as I can recall, probably a combination of our teams sucking and after 10+ years of the same old sass, we're too old and tired to care anymore...

I appreciate the effort on your part.

The bad thing is I even have tickets to the final four so I'm going to Dallas in 3 weeks and I could care less about it.

[hedge]

No. 15 WOFFORD
Best Case: Fans who make the trek to Milwaukee get reasonable weather and enjoy a brewery tour or two. Wofford's team hotel is nice. Everything goes smoothly until they insist on playing the game. The Terriers – who certainly have the résumé of a 16 seed – at least hang with Michigan until halftime before rolling over and playing dead like a good doggie.

Worst Case: Spring snowstorm hits the visitors from South Carolina in the face. The brewery tours are all booked. The team hotel is a dump. And they still insist on playing the game. Instead of hanging in until the second half, Wofford gives up four early 3-pointers to Michigan and is hopelessly behind by the second TV timeout. Flights home are canceled.

[eCat]

for anyone needing the link

The Goat Pen Bracket


http://y.ahoo.it/Mu9jtv0O

I didn't set a password or anything so I think if you have a yahoo account you can just enter it.

Also, joining this bracket does *NOT* enter you in the billion dollar bracket

apparently you do need to provide a cell phone number for validation based on comments from other people who have joined.

11 people are in it as of now

[hedge]

There's not much joy in UNC / UK sass this year. Even with a great run in the ACC, everybody knows this UNC team is sub-par at best. Being down 21 to Pitt in the second half proved that, not that any was needed. And although UK fans have to secretly be hoping that yet another Recruiting National Champion team can pull themselves together at the right time and make a run, the season so far has been disappointing. And, with their typical penchant for preparing for the worst, instead of enraging them, sassing this UK squad is going to fall on receptive ears, which kinda takes the fun out of it. Indeed, UK fans are likely to join in the chorus...

[crashcourse]

hedge 1 hedge 2 hedge 3 hedge 4--who's the other 7?

anybody doing the money

I will if 3 or 4 others are in it not named hedge 1 2 3 or 4

[eCat]

I'm in for money

that would be 3

[AlabamAlum]

Is it too late for me to join?